Hope is Expensive

Invest wisely

Photo by Yorgos Ntrahas on Unsplash

You might be expecting some doom and gloom with a title like that, but I can assure you, I’m feeling powerful, steady, and ready as I write this… and ironically hopeful!

Gifts and Investments

Hope is an amazing human gift. We didn’t beg for it, it’s just part of our nature! Hope gives us a place for our desires to live until we can make them real - kind of like a whiteboard our heart scribbled all over and yet somehow makes perfect sense. It’s that liminal experience where our future, present, desire, and fantasy meet! I love hope. Hope is the spark of creation that makes all things possible.

And I’m VERY intentional with how, who, and what I invest my hope into.

I have to be. Generally speaking (allowing for nuance wherever possible) - the more privilege you have, the more hope you can afford.

Hope invests trust in others, systems, & the world at large. Confidence, conversely, is trusting in ourselves. We can’t survive or thrive if we live too much on either side, we're humans! Dancing between the two is how we’ve literally survived and thrived on this Earth.

Those of us who are constantly hurt by an outside world or system have to put more confidence in themselves and our safe communities. It’s what every systemically marginalized group does. It’s how we survive, rebuild, regenerate, and move forward to collective freedom with joy! It can also keep us isolated from accepting & integrating a new reality when it’s available. *sad trombone noise*

For those of us with more privilege, hope provides better dividends. When privileged people invest in hope, we get something back because we see that the system works for us. We’re better able to see how to work with those systems and find opportunities to make them better and more safe for us and marginalized folx.

This is the Target-Ally-Accomplice Axis. The more Accomplices there are, the faster our societies and systems integrate difference (marginalized folx). So, how do we know when to invest in hope?

How not to Drown in Hope Debt

Remember how I said Hope is a liminal thing? It’s kind of like space or the depths of the ocean. Hope suspends us. Nothing real grows there, but instead can be plucked and planted. It’s where seeds are born, but cannot germinate.

When we invest in fantasy too much, we end up in vampiric relationships, feeding ourselves on the hologram of hope, while remaining functionally & financially hungry and expecting others to fill the void for us. We abdicate our power and responsibility. We tell ourselves that everything will be fine and that we can just sit back and it’ll all work itself out.

While that might be true for the more privileged among us, us marginalized folx know that the only thing that has made hope real has been brave people making choices and actually getting things done. We don’t just sit there and wait for someone else to save us. We save us. That’s not hope - that’s trust. That’s confidence. That’s accountability. That’s relationship. That’s human. That’s regenerative. That’s love in action.

Neither strategy is risk-free.

Hope Investment Strategy

If someone makes it clear that they hate me and want me dead based on my identity, I have a few cents of hope for them. It doesn’t cost me much to hope that they get to feel something different someday. My investment and focus is going toward things that nourish me. I’m not holding out hope that they’ll fall in love with me someday so I can prove to myself how loving the world is. I’m not into controlling people that way. I don’t need them to be different, so I don’t hope for their change.

Invest in what you know will nourish you, not what makes you look like a “good person”

If I’m close to someone and I love them and we have a conflict that we can repair, I’m gonna invest whatever hope and effort I’ve got because that relationship is so nourishing that I know love will refill that account as time goes on. Note: I didn’t say that other person would fill it up. That’s not their job. It’s my job to love in order to refill that account.

If that same person shows me that, over time, they’re not interested in repair, intimacy, or closeness, then I’ll invest less hope and take more action, aka boundaries.

Invest in mutual love and trust, and know your limits & bottom lines

When a system or government decides that a country would be better off with me dead then I keep most of my hope for myself or transfer it into some other account - like Trusting in myself and my community. The currency exchange rate is pretty solid there, so try it out and report back to me!

Invest your extra energy, space, & creativity by looking for opportunities to make systems work for you. Invest your hope only when you see a clear opportunity that will give you returns - not a moment sooner.

If this is too expensive (aka you’re heavily systemically impacted) then outsource! Build relationships with more privileged folx who can alert you to opportunities. Tell them what you’re looking for as directly as possible! Invest your hope in difference. Diversify your portfolio!!

Nourishing Trust

Even in the face of the great tragedies we are facing today, I have a lot of trust. I trust in myself to do the best I can. I trust my community to hold each other, care for each other, and keep each other alive and thriving wherever possible.

Where are you investing your Hope wisely?

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Candis Fox is a Wealth and Integrity Coach dedicated to making Revolution Delicious, Easy, and Accessible to people, businesses, & industries invested in their own integrity & truth.